On Friday I gave a shout-out to Mike Mehaffie (click here to read it!), a friend of mine in ministry with Campus Crusade who has been in full-time ministry for as long as I’ve been alive. That might not mean much to you.
To me, it means only one thing: he’s sent (roughly) 400 monthly prayer letters.
Image courtesy of asparina
Some people measure things in days, weeks, months, or years. I measure in prayer letters. Prayer letters, and bathroom breaks. (e.g. “It was a long day at work, 3 bathroom breaks and a second-hand smoke break.”)
I was on staff with Campus Crusade for 96 prayer letters. Not too shabby, except that I cheated.
Mike is for real… from the old school. He hand signs those bad boys. I on the other hand go the short-cut route, and use a prayer letter service.
If you are unfamiliar with the ins and outs of prayer lettering, there’s an entire underground devoted solely to the churning out of missionary updates. For a price, you can even buy testimonial stories from students. (I made that last part up.)
Is there a black market for prayer letters? Not to my knowledge. A way to email your prayer letter to a building in Texas and have the people there print, fold, stuff, and lick them? Absolutely.
So, in the name of making this post long enough to actually use, I give you 4 fantastic (if not improbable) reasons to use a prayer letter service:
1. You have an irrational fear of laser printer toner.
I checked phobialist.com (My mom’s second cousin owns and runs that site, no joke) and this is an unlisted phobia, but i’d propose HewletPackardiphobia as it’s name. It’s really just a very acute form of cyberphobia, which is on the list. If the thought of changing out the toner cartridge on your printer causes you to break into a cold sweat, then maybe it’s best to leave the heavy printing to the pros in Texas. Also, maybe it’s time for counseling, immediately. It’s a printer. No need to panic.
2. You are a hand model.
If there’s one thing I can guarantee about folding, stuffing, stamping, licking, and hauling all of those letters/envelopes, (other than the fact that it’s my own personal snapshot of hell’s potential torment) it’s that paper cuts are going to happen. So in the event that in addition to ministry you are also a part-time hand model, you might want to use a prayer letter service.
I can’t imagine how stressful day-to-day life is as a hand model, speaking of rabbit trails. Do you wear aloe vera-infused gloves at all times? Do you refuse to shake hands with burly people? Is there a clause in your contract with Rolex with regard to between-knuckle-hair? So many questions. What’s not up for debate (and 2000% more on-topic) is that prayer-letter related paper cuts are a real threat to hand modeling missionaries. Best in that case to use a prayer letter service.
3. You don’t have the spiritual gift of tri-folding.
When I try and hand-stuff envelopes, I get the distinct impression that people who are good at figuring out the tri-fold have supernatural help. The first time my wife showed me a z-fold, I thought it was some kind of demon-possessed origami. My wife has the spiritual gift of tri-folding. I don’t mean to get into a discussion on the continuation of the supernatural gifts (or the fact that paper-folding isn’t mentioned in any of the gift lists in scripture), but suffice it to say that if you can successfully eyeball where that first fold needs to go without having to put in a fourth fold just to get the letter in a standard envelope, I think you cheated. Or that some sort of pentecost has happened in your heart, and you are just doing your version of speaking in tongues, by putting paper into envelopes.
If you are like me and end up with 2 inches of paper hanging out of the envelope more times that you’d care to admit publicly, best to use a prayer letter service. Or a ruler.
4.You are directionally challenged.
My wife used to cry when her brothers asked her which way they should turn out of their driveway to get to school in the morning. Granted, she was in elementary school, but still, she was not very big on directional ability. If you are like the 5th grade version of my wife, you’d be much better off using a prayer letter service, because in order to successfully mail a prayer letter from home, there are at least three trips involved.
You have to find an office supply store for paper, envelopes, toner, and a coke from the cooler that is sitting near the register because you’re really thirsty.
Then you have to get in the car, drive back home (people with directional struggles know how to get from home to anywhere, not from anywhere to anywhere… you gotta go home first), and then drive to the post office to get some stamps because the only stamps at the office supply store were the leftover holiday stamps where Jesus is a pudgy white kid with a gold ring on his forehead. Then after you leave the post office you have to go home and then back to the office supply store because you realized that you only go enough paper to fill half of the envelopes. It’s like hot dogs and buns, they never make the packages hold the same amount.
Three trips later, you’ll wish you had opted for the prayer letter service.
Here’s a question: does it matter if missionaries send personalized letters every month? Why or why not?
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
You know, I think most people don’t care-they are just happy you are keeping in touch. I used to scan my signature though-nifty little trick.
April recently posted..Im on Twitter!
Yeah, I have a digital representation of my actual signature, too. good call.
Hey, the missionaries I support just send impersonal emails. And that’s fine by me! I’d rather they used their time and support money for good stuff. I’m not going to pray less with email….or give less.
Thanks for the comment! I have the same philosophy on the personal touch. Every month personally connecting with every supporter means less time connecting with the mission. But interestingly, in my training in 2002 we were told to hand-sign our paper newsletters. Times have certainly changed!
Wonder if Crusaders going through staff orientation these days are still told to send hand-signed paper letters? If that’s still the party line it may explain why I hear from my Crusade friends less and less. Back in the day, I seem to remember also being told to handwrite the addresses as well. If that means you spend all your time working on getting letters out or that you simply pull way back on how many you send, I don’t think it’s worth it. That’s where letter services, slave labor, etc. can be most helpful ; – )
Other friends in ministry, neglecting those traditional “personal touches,” seem to be more to include me in their lives. While their emails don’t stay on the desk or kitchen table as long as the paper letters, they represent a better use of the worker’s time and are easier to respond to. That’s what I want: connection.
Marti recently posted..The Ephrata Cloister and the End of the World
That’s a great theory. We think that because we are not personally connecting, that we shouldn’t connect at all. hmm.
It’s good to hear some perspective on that.
I think supporters just want the personal connection; a phone call once in awhile or personal e-mail to ask how they’re doing usually means more than hand-signing each letter. Crusade still says sign each one (at least they did 2 years ago). I hand sign my 130 letters each month, and to about a third I write a short personal note. Back when I was raising support, I hand-addressed my envelopes (until I hit the 100 mark, and a supporter told me I was crazy).
I actually just went through new staff training in June/July, and they were actually advertising a letter service at training. I think we are moving away from being told to hand sign them now.
It has been my experience with some missionaries that the agency they are with controls a lot of what they send out. If they want to send out a letter that basically says:”Please pray like mad because this is beyond my abilities and knowledge. Unless the Holy Spirit does major work in me and through me this will clearly fail”. The agency may say “that is too negative, lets be positive, write something about a victory”.
Fortunately the missions that I am closest to are ones that know only broken people can reach a broken world the with gospel – the only hope for broken things – and so they let them write honest letters.
Lee recently posted..How would you encourage a new elder
After 4 years of being a missionary, I have found that communication with my supporters is key. My basic philosophy is that prayer letters serve two critical functions: 1. encourage the supporter in the mission (let them know their prayers and support is having an eternal impact) 2. communicate how to effectively continue in prayer for the ministry and needs at hand.
It has seemed to me, they could careless that it is neither hand written, signed, sealed, nor delivered. Email (MailChimp) is awesome, now I just need to find an affordable service to reach those not on email. Would like suggests if you’ve got them.
{ 1 trackback }